somewhere between coffee + silence — the slower life I’m living now 🫶🏼

lately the days have been running into each other… not in a bad way. But more so like — I have a million things going on (and by a million I mean working full time and raising children) and I haven’t stopped to take a breath.

I’m learning to stop and smell the flowers though, my friend. On nights like this when the world is quiet, the kids are in bed early, and I can grab my computer and write… makes those long, tiring days all the more satisfying.

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. In fact, I was planning on waiting until Sunday to drop the first Sunday newsletter in weeeeeeeks and just pretend I never left. But I said fuck it and decided to write, right now! See, that’s the beauty of letting go of strict routines and forcing yourself to write when you just don’t have it in you.

There was a time when I was stressing myself to make sure that I posted 3 times a week while also carrying the heavy load of what it takes to be a mom, wife, full time worker and college student. There was a time when if I wasn’t working on my manuscript or drafting a Substack blog post that I’d feel like a failure. Those feelings are long gone.

You see, I realized that writing is my escape. It’s not an obligation. It got to a point where it wasn’t as enjoyable because I had put myself on a strict writing schedule. I can say that releasing the load of feeling pressured to write everyday has helped me in so many ways.

I can write when I want — and only when I want.

I am not on a schedule. I am not on a time limit. I am curating a soft and slow life for myself that is all about making sure that I am not over working myself so that I can enjoy my life more.

I am like this with a lot of things now though. Not just my writing. If the dishes don’t get done ONE night because my husband and I were too tired from work, that’s okay. If the laundry didn’t get folded straight out of the dryer today, that’s okay, too. The kids are happy with their bellies full, I had a cup of coffee today, I got to binge watch Gilmore girls for a few hours… and that is enough. That means it was a good day.

I want to feel free. I want to be happy. I want to be without the constant stress of not doing enough. I have accepted that I am enough. My writing is enough. No matter if I’m writing 5 days a week or once a month. I do it because I love it. I do it because it makes me feel like me. Not because I HAVE to. And realizing that is so freeing. 🤍

Now of course my Sunday newsletters are what started my entire life as a blogger so I want to stay on schedule with those. But other than that, if you aren’t seeing me post — I promise nothing is wrong. I’m just slowly sipping coffee on my patio or exploring the back roads filled with trees and swamps in my new life in Louisiana with my family of 5. 🐊✨🪾

The quiet life I always wanted is finally here. Without the noise of social media apps constantly going off, without people who I don’t know knowing my entire life, without the pressures of doing things that I simply don’t have the energy to do. I am doing whatever I want. And that feels good.

I’m free now.

See you soon. 🐾